Tuesday, April 29, 2008

My Poor Kids...

Sometimes teaching children lessons are harder on the parents than the child. Well I take that back, not just sometimes but almost always. Last night I asked Kyle to fold/hang up/put away a load of laundry. I told him he could watch TV while he did it. Before I went to bed I checked to see how well he did. I was not pleased to say the least. Nothing was put away, only a few things were on hangers and nothing was folded and he had an hour and a half to do his job. It was his bedtime so I sent him to bed. I did not finish his job, no I just hopped in bed and went to sleep with clean clothes all over the floor (it wasn’t the first time). Today I got Kyle up at his usual time and when he said he was already for school I said ok now please go finish your job. Oh my, that did not make him happy. He came back a few minutes later and said I’m finished. I thought there’s no way, not even I, the one who has the most practice at this job could finish so quickly. So I go and check. I still see a large pile of clothes. Kyle then says, I hung up all the clothes that could be hung up and then put them away. You told me I just had to hang up clothes not fold. See he thinks since I’m turning 30 this week that I’m losing my mind and I might believe his little story. I start to think about how I can get across to him the importance of doing a job and doing it the right way. I then tell him that he will be late for school today because he needs to finish his job. We are never late for school. Kyle knows how important school is and hopefully he will see how important doing a job is also even if it is just laundry. Kyle finally is finished and we head off for school 15 minutes late. I totally could have made up the time by speeding, but what would that have taught him. And besides, I still don’t have my NV driver’s license (I have a valid CO one) and I don’t want to get pulled over. So as I’m driving I’m thinking what is the office lady going to think when she hears I made Kyle stay home and put away the laundry instead of getting him to school on time. She’s going to think, wow, what a lazy mom! She makes her kids late for school just so she doesn’t have to put away the laundry. Oh well I really don’t care what she thinks about me. I know why I did it and Kyle hopefully knows why I did it and that’s all that matters to me. So I walk into the office a second behind Kyle to hear him say why he was late. He said “I was late because of laundry”. The office lady said oh we have days like that too (looking over at me) and sent Kyle on his way. Then she looked at me and told me how hers was piling up on her too. So the office lady totally thought Kyle was late for school because we were waiting on his clothes to dry. Whatever, it’s not really important to me that the office lady knows the truth.

So then I’m driving Lana to preschool and while I’m at a stoplight I look over at the Dairy Queen sign to see what their specials are. That’s normal right, to be thinking about ice cream at 9am, totally normal. The sign said their blizzard of the month was tin roof. Then I break out singing Love Shack by the B52’s. Lana is just sitting in the back staring at me. My poor kids…

If you have no idea why I started singing this song then listen at about 3:50.

Side Note: This is the only song that I have ever sang Karaoke to in public.

Friday, April 25, 2008

7 Facts About Me

I was "tagged" by my friend Elizabeth. I feel sorry for you people that are going to read about my oddities.

Here are the rules: 1) Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog 2) Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird. 3) Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs. 4) Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1. My favorite breakfast food is cheesecake. Leftover brownie sundae cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory is the best! Shh, I would never let my kids eat this for breakfast. Regular cake...maybe, but they would have to drink milk with it.

DSCF0085 2. I met my husband from the Internet. True story, no lie. I was working full time and going to school full time and trying my hardest at being a single mom. I didn’t have much time at all for socialization. I walked into my computer class and saw an old high school friend. We were trying to catch up with each other but the teacher that was trying to teach gave us “the look”. We both knew computers and could pass the class with our eyes closed but it was a required course. So we did what any computer geek would do, we made a chat room where we could “chat” without disrupting the blue hairs from learning how to email their grandkids. Soon enough we invited more of our friends to chat with us during our super boring computer class, then they invited their friends and so on. Ronnie was one of those friends of a friend. I noticed that he had an uncanny knowledge of trivia and seemed to be one of the few guys that weren’t on the internet looking for a girlfriend. I didn’t have much time for get togethers with old friends but I did fit in an hour after work every so often. It just so happened Ronnie was there one day. We became really good friends; I might even have called him my BFF back then. I loved his honesty. We were really good friends for 8 months. Then I leaned over and kissed him on New Year’s Eve. What a way to start off the year 2000! In May I was planning a wedding and we were married July 31st, 2000.

farrmgirl 3. I am the pickiest eater alive. I don’t like steak. I will not eat seafood, not even tuna fish. I will not eat lunch meat. I don’t eat eggs. I don’t drink milk. I think it comes from growing up on a farm and having fresh vegetables. Raising our own cows, chickens, and pigs to eat. Milking our dairy cow whose name was Dairy Queen. Having our own beehive. It was just nice to know where our food came from and also my parents were secretly hippies and everything was organic. As a child I ate everything, now I’m almost afraid to eat with all the recalls these days.

4. I went backstage and to a band’s hotel room. I am a big fan of the Violent Femmes. I came home from college for my brother’s wedding and one of my high school friends had gotten me a concert ticket to the Femmes while I was back in town. We went and of course made our way to the front. We hung around after the concert talking and catching up and hoping to get an autograph. The bands manager invited us backstage. We played it cool and tried not to act like giddy little school girls. They were actually nice guys and not like the normal rock star people. They were in their 40s and we were not 20s yet but somehow we had interesting conversations. Then the band said they were going to their hotel to pack and we could meet them there if we wanted to. It wasn’t like that! I know what you were thinking! We had said how hungry we were and they said they were having some food brought to the hotel and invited us there for something to eat. Two out of the three guys were married with kids, it wasn’t what you thought!

5. I don’t mind the smell of skunks. I’m not saying I want some perfume with essence of skunk but I don’t hate the smell either. I also don’t mind the smell of gasoline. Yes, my nose works just fine.

6. I hate calling people on the phone. I actually dislike talking to people through machines in general. For instance drive thru windows, the drive up teller at banks and pharmacies and I don’t even like leaving messages on answering machines. I think I was in college before I ever ordered food in a drive thru window. I cringe each time I get a new list for visiting teaching because I might have someone new on it. I don’t really mind talking to people that know me over the phone. I think it’s because they know me, they know my personality, it doesn’t always come across over the phone.

7. I love finding a bargain. The latest bargain I came across were Gold Label Roundtree & Yorke shirts that are regularly $55.00-$80.00 for $5.00-$8.00 at Dillard’s. My proudest moment however, was when Ronnie called me while he was out of town and to tell me he found the same deal on the shirts. I love it when someone else can get excited about finding a bargain. Needless to say Ronnie is styling for a fraction of the cost.

Elizabeth, I'm sure it's more than you ever wanted to know. I can't "tag" anyone because you "tagged" all the people with blogs that I know. For all you non bloggers out there, if anyone out there that wants to email me your 7 facts then please do.

The Missing Von Trapp

I saw this "test" on my friend Pat's blog and thought I would do it. I busted out laughing when I saw the results. I swear I quote something from The Sound of Music almost on a daily basis. I don't know if it's really me but it sounds like someone I would strive to be like.

Take this test!
OK, so maybe you never went straight from a convent to motherhood, but it's a safe bet that you encourage and support your family in much the same way that Maria did. Playful and yes, sometimes a little mischievous, you tend to lead by doing, and you always make sure to help your children achieve their goals without actually doing it for them.

You inspire your family because you always find creative ways to make even the most mundane chores or homework problems seem fun and important. And you want others to try to find the beauty in life — whether it's from art, music, books, or adventure. Those are just a few of your favorite things.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Holy Moly Cow Batman

Have you ever cooked for 200 people? I haven't and I don't ever intend to either. I did however plan a meal for 200 people. For some reason it seems I put more effort into things that are for other people than for my own family. For instance, buying food to feed 200 people. I never shop the deals for groceries, I just have certain stores I shop at for certain things. However, for this dinner I scoured the sale adds, compared prices online, and at stores just to find the who was a few cents less on a jar of tomato sauce. In the end I was amazed at how much I saved in doing so, but it didn't have a lasting impact. I still go to the same stores and ignore all the sales adds that are shoved into my mailbox on what seems like a daily basis.

IMG_0733Here is what a dinner for 200 people looks like uncooked. Luckily I don't have to cook it all. I have my fellow Young Women leaders to help with all the cooking. We each are preparing 4 lbs. of baked pasta. The worst part of this whole process so far has been the buying and storing of 6 lbs of chopped onions. I bought the onions already chopped and they came in plastic bags, but HOLY MOLY COW BATMAN they stunk up my car. They also stunk up my fridge. I could tell when the fridge door had been opened as soon as there was a crack. Then the smell permeated my house in a matter of minutes. I could even smell onions on my clothes when I left the house. There was no escaping the smell, until I dropped off the bundles of food to the other women who are cooking. Today I don't smell onions so either I got used to the smell or it has dissipated.

So all of this food is for a fundraiser dinner for girls camp. There is really no telling how many people will show up, it could be 50 or it could be 200. I'm hoping beyond hope that it's closer to 200 because I know I don't want the leftovers. Something about preparing so much food makes me tired of it even though I haven't even ate it.

By the way, see the dead plant in the corner, just another of my brown thumb casualties.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Earth Day

If you are wondering how to show the earth some love today let me help you. First go to GreenDimes then click on CHOOSE A SERVICE then you are on your way to being green. I have heard about this website months ago but I was waiting for earth day to see if they had any special deals. I can’t wait to open my mailbox and find absolutely nothing on the few days we do not get bills. Today they have a free do it yourself option that is something new from the other times I check the site. I know myself all too well and know if I have to send out letters and so forth nothing will get done. I opted for the premium bundle where they do the work for you.

Off the topic:

I have been wanting to post some of the things Lana says that just crack me up but I was trying to save up enough for a whole post. Well in doing so I have forgotten a lot of them. So randomly I'll post her funny quotes at the bottom of whatever post I'm working on at the time.

Lana speaks and I listen…

LANA: Mom I found two rolly pollys

ME: That’s nice

LANA: there’s a Daddy one and a baby one

ME: (wondering why there wasn’t a mommy one) oh Ok

LANA: The little one wants to do art with me, but he forgot he doesn’t have hands.

ME: (Busting out in laughter)

Last night Ronnie was reading Lana a Clifford book before bedtime. The book was about Clifford and some whales. All of a sudden Ronnie hears Lana speaking in long drawn out vowel sounds. Then Lana says “I can speak Humpback”.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

What a Night

What an exciting night I had last night. I went to bed and thought my job of mothering was done for the day. Before I went to sleep I was running through things I needed to talk about at an upcoming camp meeting the next morning. Then I finally drifted off to sleep sometime before midnight. Then I was jolted awake by the ever so lovely sound of Lana throwing up. She is not to the age yet where she can make it to the bathroom. I whisked her to the bathroom and then started striping down her bed. Oh how I love the age where they can throw up without an audience. I get Lana all cleaned up and her bed fixed and she hops right in to go back to sleep. I then had the task of cleaning the smelly bathroom. You know how they say when you lose one sense the others are heightened. Well I think this is the case even when you didn’t lose your eyesight, but they are just a little blurry from it being 2:00am. I could smell like no other, which was not helping me. Then something took my mind off the smell…a spider. As soon as I saw it I ran and hopped on my bed. Here I am, a grown woman standing on my bed all because of a spider no bigger than a dime.

Some of you might be thinking, you like insects what is the difference it’s just two more legs. I guess I have an illogical fear of spiders. I didn’t always have this fear. When I was about 3 or 4 I so proudly told my mother that I had a new pet, a hairy daddy- longlegs. My mother heard the daddy-longlegs spider part, but she said it took her a minute to figure out the hairy part. Tarantula! She said she ran outside to find me walking alongside a tarantula without a care in the world. Then there were the garden spiders that would make webs on the back porch. My mom would ask my brother and I to leave them alone because she thought they were pretty. I grew to like them also but for different reasons. I had quite the fro back then and June bugs were always flying into my hair and getting stuck. The garden spider’s web was strong enough to catch the June bugs so they were my friends.

Back to the matter at hand, me on the bed scared of a small spider. I reluctantly got off the bed and grabbed a shoe and headed back into the bathroom. The spider was still there and was not moving. I tried to squish it but it got away. Unfortunately, it ran into my room and into Ronnie’s closet. Where is Ronnie during all this mayhem you ask, he is out of town. Well I was tired and there is no light in the closet so I wasn’t going to look for it in there. So I went back to bed. Remember about Ronnie being out of town? Well I didn’t feel the need to shave my legs since he’s been gone so every time I moved trying to get comfortable I felt creepy crawlies on my legs that I just knew were spiders coming to get me. Needless to say it took me forever to get back to sleep.

Now I find out Ronnie’s flight home for tomorrow was canceled. It appears that American Airlines cannot fly any of their MD80 aircraft since they haven’t been inspected. Well I guess I’m glad that he’s not flying on a deathtrap, but I could really use him at home as soon as possible.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

April Fool's Day

Today marks Lana's first April Fool's Day that she will attend at school. I can only imagine the dread on teacher's faces today as they will most likely be the object of many April Fool's jokes. I wanted to start Lana out on the right foot so we found an idea for a nice and really cute joke that wouldn't make anyone feel bad. We made mini burgers out of nilla wafers, peppermint patties, green coconut, and red and yellow icing. Then we made some french fries out of bread stick dough that we rolled in sugar. I got some fry bags from McDonald's to make them look more like french fries.

Kyle came up with a really good idea this year, but it didn't work out. He wanted to wear this old cast he had on his arm a few years back and trick everyone into thinking he broke his arm. We actually have two old casts up in his closet, yes he is a bit of a pack rat. Both were two small to fit on his arm, darn it.

I also came across an idea for dinner tonight, but I don't know yet if I'm really going to carry through with it. It was to make meatloaf into cupcake papers and then ice the "cupcakes with mashed potatoes that have been colored with food dye. I don't know if I could actually find this appetizing enough to eat. I like my food to be separate for one thing. Yes, I know it all ends up in the same place, but I like to enjoy things one at a time. And two, I don't know if I could stomach different colored mashed potatoes. Pink mashed potatoes are one thing. They show up for Valentine's Day every now and then. I just tell myself they are potatoes with a little beet juice in them. And three, I really like the crust that forms on the top of meatloaf from the glaze. I think that would get all soggy with the mashed potatoes sitting on top. We'll see, maybe I'll just do it for the kids and live through it.

"April 1st: This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three-hundred and sixty-four." — Mark Twain